Cool Easy Cash

 We’ve been wanting to go back to Prairie Meadows Racetrack and Casino in Altoona, IA (just outside of Des Moines) for some time now.  The last time we played slots was last summer, on our way home from Kansas City we stopped at Lakeside Casino outside the small town of Osceola.  We planned ahead and decided we’d go this weekend, waste some $40 in nickels/etc.  The weather was supposed to be horrible on Saturday with plenty of freezing rain and snow, so there was no decision to make, we went Friday night.

Cherish and I arrived and had a couple drinks before Richard and Heather got there.  After they showed up we went to the high roller room first.  I’ve had good luck there before so we thought we’d go there for a couple plays then go to the nickel machines.

Richard walks right up to a slot machine, the first of the night.  Minimum bet is $5, he inserts the cash and pulls the handle.  Bam, 7-7-7, wins $500.  What are the freaking odds of hitting that on your first play?

 Right after Richard won, Cherish walked up to the machine next to it.  She had her lucky panties on so she thought she might have a chance.  She inserted $20 and after 1 or 2 pulls, bam, $405.  No freaking way! 

Money for nothing, chicks for free?  This is no endorsement for gambling.  You usually lose, it’s a fact, the odds are much against you.  Don’t expect to ever win.  My view is gambling is generally throwing your money out the window with a very remote chance of a winning.  Set your spending limit before you go.

Now everyone wants to go home but me.  Richard and Cherish already won a decent amount.  Heather has enough common sense to want to take it and run.  I wasn’t quite satisfied as we’ve only been there for half an hour and just started playing at that moment.  After trying the high roller machines myself and failing, I made everyone stick around and play the nickel machines for a while.  No wins there.  After another 30 minutes, it’s time to leave and celebrate.

Driving to the Park Ave. Pub

See our ratings for the Park Avenue Pub in Des Moines.

Some dirty old man at the Pub cracked a “Rubber Nut” on the pool table for the ladies.  Let me guess, you can hide quarters behind your ears and detach your nose between your fingers?  Talented!

 Fun with condoms.  Anyone for fisting?

 I like them rubbed “this way.”

 Josh is a ham for the camera.  There’s always something interesting to capture when he’s around.

 After Bar

 Walk like an egyptian, and other hijinks.

 Richard and Heather and Redeye, bad Canon Powershot, bad.  Go sit in your case.

Very late, time for bed.

 Pedestrian bridge over I-235 in Des Moines.

Winter weather alert, travel not advised.  You can’t win if you don’t gamble.